Signs of a Cheating Wife - What About the Heartbreak?

Infidelity expert, Octavian explains about the heartache attached when you have a cheating spouse.

Why does it have to hurt so much collecting the signs of a cheating wife?

You know that you have to make sure all your ducks are in a row, that there is no room for error. You've bought the books, read them and are following their advice on how to gather evidence on her. The software has been bought and is gathering information day and night. What about the knife of agony that is thrust through your heart? How can you deal with the uncertainty, the hurt pride and the broken heart?

It is usually impossible to tell where exactly your doubts began unless you caught her in bed with someone. Most of us have to admit that the doubts started gently, slowly, due to no obvious event. Grow they did, though.

Some signs of a cheating wife:

* Maybe it was coming home from work and the toilet seat was up when it was down when you left and no other men were supposed to have been there during the day.

* After a while, you may have asked yourself why the house was such a mess lately.

* It could be that you found some new underwear of hers that you hadn't bought of the type she usually wouldn't get for herself.

However it started, doubt began to grow. the stronger the doubt, the more suspicious clues you found. You've read books on how to gather evidence, what triggers and feeds an affair, what other signs of infidelity you could watch out for and you even have electronic spies backtracking her e-mails and cell phone calls.

This is all fine and good. Results are coming in. Yes, it sure looks like she is having an affair.

Some examples of the pain associated with the mounting signs of a cheating wife:

* Her lies are mounting as is the pain in your heart.

* You go someplace and people give you funny looks. What do they know you don't?

* Leaving home in the morning is an agony of uncertainty. Is someone waiting for an all clear signal even as you drive away?

* Is she picking up some disease that you won't know about until it's too late?

* Pride is stomping on your spirit with big boots.

* Sorrow oozes from every pore on your spirit like acid.

* Uncertainty adds a bitter taste to every moment of the day.

Take heart. You can find a place of relative peace, happiness and contentment. There is a simple thing that you can do to ease up on all this unpleasantness.

Information is the key. Get and use the tools that are readily available to you to get the evidence to be able to confront her with facts that cannot be argued away.

* Gps locators will prove she was at one place when she said she was at another.

* Credit card, cell phone and other invoices will leave a trail of guilt.

* Wireless spy cameras can capture the most damning evidence.

The real magic lies in what you do while the evidence is accumulating. This time can be used to drive yourself insane or you can use it to plan intelligently with how to handle the signs of a cheating wife.

If your heart has turned to ice, use this time to plan how you will deal with her. Is a divorce the way which best serves you or maybe a legal separation? If you have children, this time can be very well spent getting information on what would be best for them.

If you think that your love can withstand the infidelity, you might plan on offering her help and compassion. Why did she want to stray? What's missing in your life together? Is she willing to go with you for counselling or help of some other kind?

The bottom line is that the period of waiting can be used as a time of great turmoil, anger and pain. You can, on the other hand, decide that you want to offer a loving hand to your wandering wife so you can use the waiting time to organize help, find information and plan how you will gently, lovingly give her concrete evidence that you know what is going on and that you are willing to help.

Knowledge can bring you peace or chaos. Like Abraham Lincoln said, "Folks are going to be only as happy as they make up their minds to be."

Knowledge is power when dealing with the signs of a cheating wife. Get the facts and use them to find peace knowing that you are well informed and in control or use the facts to map a loving plan of action to return to the happiness you once knew.

By the way, if you're interested in further empowering yourself, click on The Best Revenge. (It is living well!)

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Octavien_J._Remillard

Common Signs of a Cheating Wife

Here's some realy good signs of a cheating wife tips from infidelity expert Seeta

Specialists will sometimes tell us that that husbands with cheating wives are slower to clue in that something is going on than wives with cheating husbands. That's because it's commonly thought that women are more perceptive when something is "off" or wrong. Also, women are thought to be more easily thrown off their regular routine than men. But, even if the signs are harder or later to discover, they are still there and, for the most part, seeing the signs is not rocket science. In the following article, I will outline what I believe are the most common signs that husbands see when their wife is cheating.

Women Often Cheat For Different Reasons Than Men: Before I get to the signs, I'm going to quickly go over why women cheat. I am doing this because I want for you to understand where her thought process is going here. Understanding her thinking and how she is likely justifying her behavior in her own mind will often help you to catch her.

Wives often cheat because they feel that their boyfriend or lover "gets" them and appreciates them more than their husband does. Women often feel very much taken for granted and unappreciated. And often, they won't bring this up. They won't say "listen, I am feeling like I'm a second class citizen in our home. I feel like I'm the one matters the least of every one living here."

No, this would be very rare. Instead, they will let this frustration fester and literally almost boil over. And then, one day, when someone else pays attention to them, notices them, compliments them, and really seems to want to understand them, it's not very hard to understand why they might see this as attractive and desirable.

Sometimes husbands think that their wives lover is better or more desirable than them in some way. Maybe they perceive that he makes more money or is better looking. This is usually not the answer. Often, it's the fact that he's presented himself as a good listener who understands her and who values her happiness and well being. He's romantic (or so he makes her believe) and he's unbelievably attentive. She will usually weigh this with feeling taken for granted at home and she might come to the conclusion that there really is no comparison.

Some Telling Signs That Your Wife Might Be Cheating On You: In order for your wife to move forward and see someone else, she's going to need to distance herself from you and to find fault with you. So, she will leave all sorts of clues that she is doing this. She'll sometimes become belittling, judgmental, and argumentative. She will pick fights so that she can paint you as the bad guy. She might poke fun at you sometimes. She may come right out and tell you that you don't begin to understand her. She might become more verbal and argumentative than she has ever been before because she is attempting to assert her independence.

Changes In Her Routine: You'll likely see a lot less of her and you'll notice changes in her routine. Maybe she had dinner with you every Saturday night or had drinks with coworkers after a mid week meeting. You may see her changing these things up and telling you that she's going shopping, taking a class, or doing something else where you would not need to come along and can't easily verify where she actually is.

She might also be different in terms of intimacy and sex. Sometimes, things will cool way down and sometimes things will heat way up. Actually having more sex is sometimes meant to throw you off the trail or happens as she is experiencing or wanting to experiment with different things.

Changes In Her Appearance, Happiness And Energy Level: Another tip off is her suddenly wanting to look her best all of the time. Maybe she was perfectly happy in sweats and tennis shoes when she wasn't working before, but now she wants new clothes, a new hair style, and a new attitude. She'll likely seem to have a lot more energy, be a lot more busy, and seem much more content than before.

A Cheating Wife May Guard Her Cell Phone, Computer, Car, Purse, And Clothing Like These Things Are Prized Possessions: Obviously she's going to want to keep her activities from you, at least at first. (Sometimes they get to the point where they don't care if you find out and actually want you to catch them. But in the beginning at least, this is rarely the case.)

You might notice that she doesn't want you anywhere near her purse or her car. She'll carry it with her everywhere (the purse) and may even lock it in her car at night. You might see her erasing the internet, email, and cell phone history. Many people communicate with the other person on facebook. She might open a new account there, change the password on her old account, or leave the old account stagnant. She may also do the laundry behind closed doors and be secretive about seemingly meaningless things that just don't make sense.

It's pretty easy to see signs that things are changing. However, she will often deny anything is wrong when you confront her. This doesn't mean that you should give up if you really want to know the truth. She will leave clues because her world is changing and you share this world, at least for now. She has to see and communicate with him some how and there is almost always evidence of this.

I was in this same situation a short time ago, but I tried to confront my husband too soon, before I had proof, and of course he denied everything and the confrontation about his cheating went horribly. I decided that I really wanted to know the truth, no matter what that truth was. I learned how to get concrete information and proof that my husband thought that he had hid and erased. Once I presented this to him, he had no choice but to come clean. You can read my very personal story at http://catch-the-cheating.com/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Seeta_Dean

signs of a cheating wife